The back must be straight
"How did you learn to meditate?"
"Once I realized that what I do all the time is actually meditation."
"Isn't meditation only done in a meditation pose?"
"Many people do it while ironing or washing dishes, self-taught. But anyway, every day you do what is, from a professional point of view, a very serious meditation, which takes you very deep when you fall asleep."
"But when I fall asleep, I don't control it."
"Then you know what waking dreamers are."
"Will you teach me?"
"Oh, sure! Sit down here and sit with your back straight."
"Like this?"
"Yeahhhhh. Now you have to sit quietly like this for two hours. It's an exercise, let's start."
"Am I sitting right?"
"In terms of Chi, excellent."
"So now I'll sit quietly for two hours. What should I do in the meantime?"
"Try not to think about anything."
"Think about nothing?"
"If you can think about nothing, that's something."
"It's impossible."
"That's why not everyone gets it right the first time and it takes years to get the hang of it. That's why you're asking me to teach you after I've told you what's good for you. But I like a challenge. Hey, straight back!"
"You have a special meditation pose?"
"Special? Yes, but what's special for me might be ordinary for you."
"What is your average?"
"I don't know, as good as. I usually like to do it in my armchair, or I fall into my bed. The latter is when it doesn't really need you, just the bandwidth."
"Do you fall asleep?"
"There are lots of little stations between the Waking and Deep Sleep end of the lines."
"So you fall asleep."
"To a casual outside observer, yes."
"Wait, I don't understand, in that case, why should I have to sit with my back straight for two hours?"
"This is the first time in my life I've ever been in the position of teaching someone to meditate. I've refused to do anything like this before, but now I feel like it."
"And you, the sleeper, are going to start teaching me to do this, when you may never have done it in your life?"
"That's how it was with responsibility back then. And now I'm teaching it excellently."
"So I just sit and think about nothing. But what if I'm trying, but I can't, and a thought comes?"
"Now that's meditation."